Found out today that another coworker is pregnant, due in November.
For those of you keeping score, that makes four total IRL.
And I'm hostessing a surprise baby shower this coming Tuesday for the one who is due in June.
WhatisthisIdon'teven.
I feel like my comment in bible study Monday night about being at peace about the baby situation was heard as a challenge. Like the Enemy heard it and said, "Peace, huh? We'll see about that."
Trying to hang on and focus on the positive things. Like the awesome week R and I spent without the kids, just being married and focusing on each other. No way we could do that with another little one.
Am I supposed to learn something here? Am I supposed to have some great AH-HA that settles everything once and for all?
The only thing I have right now is an excess of tired; I can't remember the last time I was so exhausted. So, rather than stay up and torture myself, I'm going to pour myself a drink and crawl into bed.
Goodnight, all!
Glad you are taking care of yourself. My experience is that sometimes the thing to learn is to turn to the Lord, and pour my heart out to Him, so that He can comfort me and give me what I need to live the next moment. I don't think pain and loss necessarily get settled (read: go away and don't ever hurt again) in this lifetime. But Jesus said that we can know His peace as we abide in Him moment by moment. Some days we are wilting on the vine, some days we are brilliantly blooming (a garden analogy a la John 15), but the vine never fails. It is always there to nourish and support the flower.
ReplyDeleteHmm ... Or the fruit, which might have been a better analogy, and more Scriptural. I do find that God uses the comfort He has given me to comfort others, and so He redeems my pain and loss in ways I never could have imagined. Praying that you are experiencing His comfort today.
ReplyDelete